Everyone tell Jodie...
Happy Birthday!
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31.01.07
30.01.07
Tuesday
So Monday night went a little better. I went with Susanne, my relocation helper, to the car dealer to pick up my car. I learned a few of things: The warranty works fine, the mechanic who speaks good English is on vacation, Germans will do almost anything to get rid of non-German speaking customers even if it means going above and beyond. The mechanic was afraid to come out until he was told I had a translator with me. For you car people, I had failed crank position and cam sensors, which put the car into limp mode.
The other major accomplishment for the day was buying a receiver. I now have radio reception in my house. That means someone will come along asking me to pay the radio tax at some point. It's required because I am able to receive federally subsidized broadcasting. Same thing goes for a tv when I get one. Still, listening to the radio feels like a step towards normalcy. I think the most frustrating thing about this move is having to conduct all of your major life transactions at one time. An apartment, furniture, appliances, and a car are a lot to shove into a 3 week period with the expectation that you actually get some work done. There seems to be a language barrier too.
The roads are clear again and the people are driving like fiends. I had a little frustration driving last night and have to admit to a little hoarsness this morning. I'm trying really hard with the driving thing, and maybe it's just being in a large city, but I've found people will cut you off, tailgate, park anywhere, stop for inexplicable reasons in the middle of the street, crowd in a huge line in the left lane at a stop light knowing damn well it merges into one lane in 100 yards, and just cause general mayhem. On the up side, most people let you in when you signal.
Buses will put you into the wall.
I still wonder what that girl who wanted directions was thinking...
29.01.07
Sunday
I took the opportunity on Sunday to do some exploring around the neighborhood and figured out the walk to the grocery store and local commercial center. It's about 1.5km away which for most Germans doesn't require a car. I also found the McDonald's which is the closest T-mobile hotspot. It will have to do until I get internet at home. I thought about having the uncommon experience of ordering a beer and sitting down to read email but the counter clerk said good morning so I decided on a diet coke instead. Sundays are days for hobbies and friends as all businesses except restaurants and gas stations are required by law to be closed. If you have errands to run they have to be done M-F from 8am - 8pm or Sat from 10am - 6pm. Nothing else is possible.
Things are starting to have a settled feel because I had some downtime on Sunday. The kitchen is due caledar week 7 - everyone uses businees week format here and I took the time, a long time, to write out the complaints about my car to the dealer. Plus the relocation person is meeting me there this afternoon to help clear things up. I have a year to fight with them under warranty and they are a 20 minute walk away. This is one thing I have time for. (For my BMW friends - a call from the factory service tech probably wouldn't hurt my case :) )
I'll try to bump up the font size for clarity. Let me know if it's successful.
26.01.07
Things Keep Getting Better!
I finally ordered my kitchen after work last night. A few language problems and I was running late for a meeting of Bosch expatriates (but my guides were late too) and apparently no problems. All the main roads were clear and I was on the way home, driving my new car and thoroughly enjoying the experience. As I was coming off the Autobahn exit into Stuttgart, a long, downhill spiral, my car shut off and would not re-start. "Super," I think, and coast around to the off-ramp by McDonald's.
The car came from the big BMW dealer and a year of warranty, road side assistance, etc so I call the number (conveniently located under the rear hatch) and get some people who speak English. So during this call, whille I'm sitting on the exit ramp with the emergency flashers on, talking on the phone, some girl walks up, knocks on my window and asks for directions??? "I speak little German," I say in German, so she asks the foreigner again in English for local directions. "I don't know," in German accompanied by one of my more charming expressions, I'm sure. So, while I'm back to the phone describing the problem, the police pull up; say "get off the phone and talk to us," which I do, and they end up helping me push the car into the parking lot. They made sure I could handle it from there and went on their way. 2 points for efficiency. I call BMW again and get my location and problem cleared up and have an hour to kill. I start by thoroughly dis-enjoying a McKäs (McCheese, who knew they came with swiss) and walking through Media Markt (eg, Circuit City). The BMW rescue/service vehicle shows up, plugs into my car, and the mechanic opens by pointing to his screen and saying "Fehler, Fehler, Fehler, so viele Fehler." I don't think anyone needs a translation. Of course, the car starts again of its own accord. Packed, I might add, with Bosch automotive electronics.
The mechanic speaks like six words of English and my German still blows so we're having some serious difficulties with communication. After several misunderstandings, I managed to get out "I just bought this car last week," in German, to which he smiles and says "then no Problem," in English, "come with me and we'll get a rental car." in German. Some more confusion ensues, which ends with "oh, you want me to bring the car too."
Car's at the dealer for repair, free of charge, and I'm driving a new BMW until it's settled, also free of charge. I'm supposing that's part of what I over-spent on the car for.
In the midst of all this, I did manage to call Magi, and let her know that I wouldn't be making it this evening. I have to reschedule the kitchen delivery date as well.
Lastly, the mechanic told me something I thought I would never hear; "I think your German is much better than my English."
25.01.07
Wednesday Redux
Ok, later in the morning I was able to borrow a snow shovel and a coulpe of guys helped me get my car into a parking space. I dug myself some clearance in order to be able to leave without incident. Made it home ok and promptly discovered I had locked myself out. I had taken two mailbox keys and left behind two keys, both of which open my parking garage, main building door and apartment door. Caught the landlord on an errand run in progress and was into my apartment in under half and hour. Ran the Ikea kitchen planner to make sure everything was correct and took my laptop with me to Ikea to make sure I had all the data. Made it to Ikea with an hour and fortyfive minutes to spare, walked in the door to the restroom and promptly heard the anouncement that Ikea was closing early in 15 minutes.
That's right folks, I drove all the way out to Ikea in order to pee.
Went back home and assembled my bikes, got rid of most of the remaining boxes and drank $0.99 worth of German beer. For those of you keeping count, it was three beers.
Thursday morning was better. The German Telecom guy showed up on time and I now have a phone line in the apartment. Roads were cleared to a reasonable level today and I was able to stop by a hotspot to save my kithcen layout to Ikea on the web. They will have it online so all I have to do is be there during business hours. I hope.
24.01.07
Winter has Arrived
It's still snowing from last night. I wasn't particularly worried about getting to work because I thought Germany was prepared for things like this and assumed it'd be no different from CO or Canada where I've driven in the snow several times. Both last night and this morning were like a mad house. Traffic was everywhere last night with people sliding all over the place and this morning was no better. It took me over an hour to make the 20-30 minute drive to work and along the way were several stuck LKWs (semi trucks), I watched a city bus that was blocking my intersection try to get unstuck for about 10 minutes before finally giving up, and just general mayhem. I let my navigation system reroute me through town and got to work. The parking lot wasn't cleared and my car is now stuck there, right in the middle of the lane. I have no idea how I'm going to get the car out or get home tonight or if there are even plans to clear the parking lot. I don't understand how Germany can be so unprepared for this, it happens every year.
At work I found out some of the trains aren't running. The bus situation is obvious.
I did sleep in my apartment last night but, of course, couldn't get to the store to order a kitchen. It doesn't look too good for tonight either. Still no phone in the apartment.
People at the office say "ha ha, winter in Germany" but today is an absolute cluster fuck. It can't be like this through the entire next 3 months. I guess I'll try to move my car again after lunch and see what happens from there.
This never would have happened in Canada.
22.01.07
Last day at the hotel
So I was sitting in my apartment tonight doing some of the usual stuff; assembling Ikea furniture, washing a full laundry load consisting of 2 pairs of jeans, a couple of t-shirts and socks, drinking some beer mixed with lemonade, and sorting my trash into three different groups.
Tonight is my last night at the hotel. I really can't justify staying here any longer. I think in some ways it's been a bit of a crutch. When I check out, I have no where to go but home - in Germany.
Also my last night at the hotel restaurant. Stuttgart is in the Schwabian region, which is very roughly analagous to the southern United States. Funny accents and different food. Tonight I ordered a regional called "Schwabian Tappas." It consisted of six small dishes which I will now attempt to describe. There was cold German potato salad topped with 2 warm meatballs, spaeztle noodles (which are pretty good), maultaschen (essentially a ravioli-style shell filled with bland pork stuff), black sausage with mustard, salami-type chunks of sausage with pickles, and the corner stone of the entire meal, limburger cheese in vinegar and onions. I did not finish the cheese.
Tomorrow is a new day. I sleep in my new apartment, drive my new car to work, and go yet again to Ikea to order a kitchen.
20.01.07
Sunday
So, I'm sitting here in the restaurant and it's getting close to 11:00pm. I was thinking earlier what an absolute marvel of technology it is for me to be able to sit here in Germany and communicate with my friends who are 3000 miles away. 20 years ago, people like me had to rely on letters that took over a week and atrociously expensive phone calls routed through Ma Bell. I should know, I was in Europe 20 years ago.
Starting to get a little lonely here. No land line yet and the calls to Bill are very expensive. Maybe next week I'll be able to add that to list of accomplishments. Dave's been good about sending lots of email - sometimes you just want to see something by someone who's a native English speaker. I've also waxed a bit nostalgic and started remebering all the endearing things about my friends that make them special. Even JC has his high points.
Fair warning; the computer is still hobbling a bit and I don't have the luxury of speel check at the moment. Any errors will simply have to stand. Typing is getting a bit confusing as German keyboards are different. The "z" and "y" keys are swapped, the question mark is elsewhere, and virtually the entire cast of special characters above the numbers and punctuation seems all scrambled. There are, however, keys in place to type umlaut (2 dots over) a, e, o, and u. Go figure that one out.
I spent most of the day assembling some of my furniture, installing light fixtures and finishing off the kitchen floor. I now have mounted lights in every room, an acceptable kitchen floor, part of a wardrobe (no closet, remember), and one night table. Typical stuff for moving into an apartment in Germany. I do, however, have the luxury of being able to stay at a hotel during all this so I don't have to sleep in the clutter. I think checking out of the hotel will make it official. I will be living in Germany. Somehow, I just don't feel quite ready for it.
How's this for disjointed: Earlier in the morning, I went (again) to Ikea to shop for said wardrobe. Somehow I managed to stuff a 2 meter high by 1 meter wide mirrored door into the back of my station wagon along with all the other crap. Definielyl a day of heavy lifting. Ikea was it's usual Saturday surge of people that would put Wal-Mart to shame. Speaking of station wagons, they're incredibly popular here. You pay a premium in all the marques for a combi-wagon which seems to be what people would rather have than a sedan. Strange, very strange.
No kitchen yet either. My basic German is not too bad but using the Ikea kitchen planner is hard. They left off teaching words for "cabinet that the sink mounts in" and so forth. I plan to try it later tonight with the online translator.
I didn't even get to drive my new car today (seems eveyone is getting a new car these days except JC).
17.01.07
Unnatural Disaster
So, the worst possible personal issue has transpired this week. There is a mechanical failure in laptop's hard drive. I am cutoff from both the internet and personal email until the repair guy can get it up and running again. Worst case is I lose all the programs I installed, a few pictures that are not backed up at home in the States, and all the CDs I ripped from my collection - also back home. This is a six week old computer I bought from Cicuit City in Greenville so probably not even worth bothering to call. I'll end up paying for the repair to save myself the time and trouble of dealing with HP. If you ask, of course, their computers suck.
I found a small Italian restaurant down the street from my apartment last night and had my first piece of lasagna made by real Italians, a couple more beers, and some time to consider the last few days. Too bad I couldn't write it down. I don't think a swipe at the topic I have in mind from the office can do it justice so I'll put it off to another time.
I went to the Obi store last night which is the German equivalent of Home depot and managed to buy linoleum, trim and the tools to install it entirely in German. A minor victory for this week. I've got before, and soon to follow after, pictures which I'll get uploaded when the laptop returns.
One word about service in German. It's horrible by the American standard but that is a qualified statement. The American standard is that the service happen right away. My observation is that although most service happens quickly, it is often poorly executed and requires constant follow up. In Germany you will starve waiting for the waitress, learn to ride a bike waiting on the mechanic, and generally lose interest in or forget whatever it was you were waiting on in the first place. That being said, once said service arrives, it will be flawlessly and thoroughly carried out according to an extensive checklist as well as any other provisions provided by you in advance. You will not have to call back unless you forgot to ask for something in the first place. Good service, by this definition, is expected by most Germans to the extent that not receiving it is almost unthinkable. An extraordinarily heated conversation would immediately follow.
15.01.07
Survived a Weekend
Still waiting on the computer technician. There's an appointment on Tuesday night and then the phone people come Thursday and then a short 2 - 6 weeks away from high speed internet again. Hopefully someone else in the building has an unsecured network I can pirate in the short term or I'll be walking myself to the nearest T-Mobile Hotspot.
Spent the weekend cleaning the new apartment and assembling my bed in anticipation of the rest of my stuff arriving Monday morning - which it did. The kitchen has a decidedly wet dog smell which I attribute to moisture seeping in the old linoleum. I decided to have the floor replace since it a cavernous 7.5 square meters and the rest of the kitchen as well. Decent kitchens are unbelievably cheap here and I would have looked for an apartment without a kitchen knowing what I know now.
I learned how to turn on the radiator in my hotel room last night - I thought the room was a little cold.
Tonight is washing sheets and unpacking. Maybe if I can find a shower curtain I can sleep there.
12.01.07
It's Just Another Day
So things are more or less on even keel. Unfortunately, my laptop crashed last night and will only start in safe mode. Normally I would spend several hours and tantrums fixing it myself but I just don't have the time right now so I have something that has finally become my on personal flashing VCR clock. I just don't feel like fixing it and will end up paying someone. Besides, my system restore disks are still packed up in airfreight.
I met a German friend for dinner last night and we spent the first 20-30 minutes entirely speaking German. It went fine except I just can't go into much depth on anything yet. Still, it was good to get the one-on-one practice before we went back to English. He also brought the Bosch navigation system I bought through Germany last year and I got to try it out alongside the rental car system I already have. The Bosch unit works better but it only speaks German. Not too bad for me but English would have been nice (and €150 more).
Just got the car insurance quote and it's ok. Roughly comparable to the U.S. plus the 20% cost of living increase.
I've learned a few more breakfast words so I can buy something besides a pretzel with butter.
Hopefully I can get my computer back soon - it's turning out to be a pretty good refuge from all the foreign-ness over here.
10.01.07
Another Day, Another Fortune Flushed Down the Toilet
One of the unpleasant things about expatriating is that, in spite of how well the company takes care of you, getting settled feels like you are spending money like there's no tomorrow. Which, in fact, is almost true. Two years is not permanent.
Today was the first really full day at work. I firmly believe that Germans work harder on average than Americans...provided you can catch them there between vacations. I can already see I will be busy. I did manage to speak a little German this afternoon during a meeting and I must say it went not too bad. It takes about two sentences to get in over my head but it's a start. Lunch was...unique. We went to another plant for an afternoon meeting and ate at the big Bosch cafeteria in Feuerbach. I am not a picky eater so no problems finding food. What I got today was the equivalent of two (admittedly high quality) hot dogs in a bowl of split pea soup with bread on the side. It tasted ok but there was a lot of fiber in that meal. Some of you probably know what I mean.
I also joined a gym without the aid of my relocation person today. Not too bad and I got a Bosch discount.
Lastly, I bought a car. I was going to wait for an appointment with Susanne to get some help but as I was leaving there seemed to be a veritable line of people going through my car. I though (to myself) "I'll be damned if I lose another one." So I went back in and told the dealer I'd take it and we'll see how the paper work goes. Overall, I feel like I got my money's worth but I way overspent from the original "plan." Still, how many opportunities will a person ever have to drive a German car on German highways? We'll see if the ultimate driving machine lives up to its name.
"How was the first drive?” you ask. I don't know. In Germany, you don't get the car right away. It takes a week.
09.01.07
Today was a Good Day
Today was good, maybe because i didn't go to work. I met with Susanne, the relocation agent, instead. Let me preface everything with what a tremendous job the relocation service does. Immediatel after my infor trip, I though it was pretty easy; look around at some apartments, walk throu Ikea, etc. What this lady really does, every week, is the stuff that people absolutely hate dealing with every 5 - 10 years. She takes care of the residency and work permits, which I got today. She registers with phone, electricity, harasses the new landlord, signs up for internet, negotiates with the car dealer, find doctors, schools, whatever. All those tedious tasks that you as a citizen hate to do but find relatively easy, she takes care of. Appreciation is duly served.
I got the keys to my apartment today and discussed, with Susanne present, the few remaing details of the apartment. I bought a bed, or at least tried to. BW-Bank did not send my EC card PIN and it wouldn't work at Ikea so Susanne paid for it for me. I got a German cell phone which, by the way, is the latest and greatest Razr for a dollar and the monthly service is cheaper than my U.S. plan. Americans are getting screwed by the telecom companies.
Around 5:00pm, I got back to the hotel and went down to the bar for a beer. About my hotel: It is a Holiday Inn at 150 euros a night. Not the Berlin Hilton, but not exactly a cheap dive either. Anyway, at the bar to my right was a slightly older German business man having a preliminary meeting with his call girl. To my left was some German guy who was so drunk he felt compelled to dance (with his pen during the Visa signing) to the Madonna song playing. The bartender had no idea what made me laugh after they all left.
08.01.07
Almost Everything Sucks
Ever have one of those days when you're frustrated almost beyond your limits and nothing seems to work out exactly right? Welcome to moving to a foreign country. No matter what I plan and try to arrange properly, I keep ending up getting screwed out of my first choice on everything by nothing more than circumstances.
The car I wanted had already been sold, by the way.
So, the relocation lady went to the wrong car dealer and didn't have additional time to find me. I made two or three ridiculously expensive phone calls from my American cell phone, the car had been sold last week but it made sense to leave it sitting on the lot with all the others apparently, and I was two hours late too work with absolutely nothing to show for my time.
Things are neither backwards nor God-forsaken here but they certainly are different.
07.01.07
Even more pictures
I specifically left the comments on this blog open to allow people to harangue, harass, and otherwise give me grief during this process. The oldest person on my email list seems to be the most web savvy....
This, BTW is one of the better pictures from Halloween 2006
Breakfast Buffet
So I made it to Sunday, another day in Germany when nothing is open. I'm down to my last half of a book from the flight, I'm not in my apartment yet, CNN repeats itself, and no word from the relocation service on helping me with my car. I'm guessing they're closed on Sunday too. I know I would be. Internet service is a small consolation. At eighteen euros a day, it better be.
This is the point where I'm tired of the hotel but not yet tired of carbonated water, which is the water of choice here. I've got co-workers who've been driven half mad by the lack of plain old bottled water. No explanation on why they couldn't drink the tap water.
I broke down this morning and had the breakfast buffet at the hotel - German breakfast is like no other in the world that I've seen. About a half dozen or so types of cold cuts, as many cheeses, all kinds of smoked fish with the proper condiments, fruit salads, cereals, spreads from chocolate to butter, and about a hundred different types of bread, none of which seem to have refined white flour. The coffee is really good and, of course, there was carbonated mineral water.
The little differences are small but pervasive here. Everyone holds their fork in their left hand through the whole meal. The Continental Style, as it's called. Germans neatly fold even their paper napkins at the end of the meal which makes you feel a bit odd for balling yours up.
Driving back from Stuttgart yesterday, I spotted a group of people walking down the sidewalk. Natural enough in a large city except that they were carrying an entire roasted pig on a spit between them. I tried for a picture but I was moving too fast. Maybe next time.
Later on at a late lunch, I sat at a bar table for something light...and a beer. There were two little old ladies at the table across from me and a Yorkshire terrier occupying a third chair. Not unusual, I think, it's seen all the time in Europe. As I was waiting for the bill, I noticed the waiter clearing the ladies' table: Coffee cups, saucers, plates, silverware, and a stainless steel bowl of water for the dog.
06.01.07
Pictures
This isn't the officially sanctioned method and the image file is huge to retain it's pristine clarity, but i felt Joe deserved the recognition from the going away party.
http://www.12claws.com/blog/2007/joe.html
so I edited this to include a smaller file:
Ordering the wine
So I've learned today; if a German waiter asks if you want dry red wine, say yes. You'll still get something that tastes like Kool-Aid made under a six year old's direction and discretion. I had a second flasche (you don't get a glass, you get a little 0.4 liter carafe to pour into your glass) because of the other spectacle. Tonight was apparently family night at the hotel and there was one huge table accomodating six adults and six children. From what I could tell it was two doting grandparents and two of their siblings with spouses. Needless to say the kids got rowdy and the few other people in the restaurant began to give disapproving looks. It was then that the unthinkable happened. Every single offending child in the group was marched out of the dining area and disciplined into silence for the meal. We are no longer in America.
Today was Saturday and also a bank holiday. A bank holiday seems to carry about the same weight here as Chistmas or New Year's. Everything was closed. I took the opportunity to shop for a car without the kind help of sales people.
Around lunch time, I was hungry and desperate to find somewhere open. I had to eat at McDonald's. I think that's at least one aspect of American culture best left in America. The 1/4 pounder is indeed a Royale with cheese incountries with the metric system.
I found a car but, of course, no sales person to help. I'm worried I'll lose my first choice (Porsches aside) like all the other options here. It's an Audi A4, older with ridiculous low kilometers and an honest to God tuner car in the German fashion, which means factory certified and done right. We'll find out tomorrow.
03.01.07
Sitting at the airport
So here it is guys, I'm sitting in Atlanta Hartsfield having said goodbye to all my frieds over the last week and Bill, Addie, and Milo this morning. I don't think reality has quite sunk in as I feel like I'm going on an extended business trip. I'm sure the next couple of weeks will bring the tears, fears, and waves of overwhelming loneliness that everyone decribes at some point or another.
The moving people did show up this morning and packed the few earthly possesions I decided to take with me into 18, er 15 according to the invoice, boxes that will show up on Monday to an apartment for which I have no bed. Work starts that day as well.
The next plane to Germany leaves in 3 hours and I will officially be expatriated.
No pictures yet - I just haven't had time to master it.