Mona Lisa is Having a Bad Day
win a prize for telling me where that reference is from...
I should forward this by calling it a piece of creative writing to fend off the scared, pathetic, or otherwise litigious-happy imbeciles in the world. They are simply digested thoughts that, unlike the Bush administration would have you believe, are not yet a crime in and of themselves. I’ll probably be listed as a dissident anyway. I do transfer money and phone calls to foreign countries.
Let me further state that I do not yet fully have a daily routine established.
Today started out "normal." I got up and went to work at the usual time, had some interesting design discussion regarding a product change, and generally interacted in a mundane, work-day sort of way with the environment. Then my mountain bike, which I had shipped to the plant, arrived. If I do nothing, the worst that can happen is I get charged with an 800 Euro tariff for importing my 8 year old bike. After some phone calls and a very nice man at the local customs office, we get down to the gist of the matter. It will be fine, but I have to show up and fill out some forms. On its own, this might not be such a crushing blow but I'm afraid nothing has been as it was lately and life has turned into a seemingly endless string of isolated incidents. I no longer like isolated incidents.
I am not knocking Germany here by any means. Any foreigner moving to any foreign country to live has gone through a lot of what I’m seeing now. As a resident and not a tourist, I have to re-learn a lot of cultural rules, behaviors, and boundaries in order to fit in and not disrupt the flow of the society I’ve been thrust into. Some of the rules are the same, some of them are similar, and some of them make absolutely no sense to an outsider.
Saturday I finally found protein powder, and a pretty good one at that. It turned out to be unflavored and tasted a little bit not good mixed with water. Monday, I finally found soy milk, a staple of mine. At breakfast this morning, I read a little closer because I bought unflavored on purpose but didn’t realize it was completely devoid of any flavor - for cooking. Mixed with the protein powder, it had the appeal of mud that has not yet turned rancid. I tried, but ended up pouring it out and having a banana. Then work, then the bike. I don’t know if the bike has cleared customs yet but they gave it to me anyway - another rule violation but the customs officer I spoke to said, incredibly, that I didn’t know and it wasn't my fault. I've also had a mouth ulcer since Thursday. Those of you who get them know what charms it can add to chewing or breating cold air the wrong way.
So now I'm driving home with illegally imported goods, on the second day of a six week streak where I've yet to work five full days without an incident that causes me to be late for or miss work. I was 0.25 hours away from getting out of the hole and actually having overtime. It’s too much, I'm beaten up for the day, and on the way to the gym, some f**k cuts in front of me at a long stop light - not even the legally sanctioned way. Is it any wonder I wish I had a set of brass knuckles and a kevlar glove to climb out of the car with and make my own rude point through his windows? I've got a lot on my mind these days and the heavily suppressed rage is sitting just below the surface at this point. Of course, on the heels of reading a book full of graphic violence which I typically avoid if it's realistic fiction. Fortunately, I stay in the car and let someone in between us. Then I have the chance to sit and boil my thoughts as the city traffic creeps along and it's just plain bad. I don't like badness but there it is.I get to the gym without incident and start a workout with all the anger and frustration that a, hopefully, sane person can have, basically fuming at all the inequities of the world. By the time I get to shoulders, my thoughts have turned more serene like "gee, this seat is hard and I'm a little saddle-sore from the bike yesterday." I really started off thinking anger like that couldn't be channeled. I see that I am wrong. I've re-centered a bit and remembered that this happens to everyone. I've also remembered that I'm not suffering in a vacuum - the people around me have feelings too.
I often tell people that I need to have a routine and I seldom make idle statements. A routine, even a fitness routine, is the thing that lets me smile at you in the morning and help with your problems.
Comments
John,
seems like we'd have to have another beer together, what do you think?
Marcus
Posted by: Marcus | 21.02.07 12:54