just john

 For those of you wondering, blog is phonetic shorthand for web log. Now you know.

I also got to use a German expression that I recently learned today. Literally translated it means "I guess we drew the ass card." I'm hoping it catches on in the U.S.

Posted by justjohn at 21:44 | Permalink | Comments (1)

I have been chastised for not writing. I had not realized there was much, if any relevance to it except as a record that I was over here and doing this. The comment sections help to remind me that maybe someone is interested after all..

Sadly, the highlight of the last few days has been terribly uninspiring. I now have bathroom storage. Recall from previously that German apartments do not come with closets, lights, cabinets, shelves, appliances, and often kitchens. Ergo, I had to provide my own all of the above. Today signifies the last remaining bit of clutter being put out of sight. As a highlight, I did manage to have some semblance of a conversation, in German, from the guy I picked up the cabinet from. He observed that it was almost beer garden weather today (anything over 50 degrees F). I agreed and mentioned that South Carolina was 27 degrees C yesterday (80 something) and that I miss my motorcycle, which is home. He used to have a bike himself and naturally assumed, since I was an American, that it was a Harley. I corrected him that no, it was a Honda. In fairness, he hadn't been keeping up and wondered if they still made Harley Davidsons. I almost told him no, they were bought out by Hyundai, but thought better of it.

I'm learning about spring these days. Apparently there are places where the gap between winter and summer is taken up with unpredictable, crazy-ass weather. I would have to say, spring is the most un-German thing about this place. You can't plan on anything with it.

Still no regular tv. I'm starting to wonder what I ever saw in the stuff in the first place. I bought another cheap satelite box for $30 to use as a diagnostic tool and it turns out I am simply not getting the signal. Fortunately, it's an issue for the Haus Meister. In the U.S., we would call him the super.

I'm almost ready to start taking pictures of cars, but I'm waiting for everyone to get there summer wheels and tires on. Wouldn't be fair otherwise. 

Work is getting to be long. Almost every day is stretching into overtime. I'm running into some "unestablished credentials" issues with another department. It's a bit obnoxious and childish, especially given that the issue in question sits squarely in the middle of what I'm good at. On the upside, I am right, and my supervisors have been outstanding about backing me up. Funny how expensive other people's doubt can get. At first I thought all Americans were automatically wrong, but my co-workers have assured me that we are truly in an egalitarian dilemma.

At some point, they're going to make me use this overtime as extra vacation.

Two, no three bits of excitement. I've booked my Pensacola ticket for Memorial Day and booked flights for my mother and youngest brother to come out here in July. Hope everybody makes it.

Posted by justjohn at 20:48 | Permalink | Comments (4)

Today it rained and snowed and the sun shone. Then it rained again.

Tuesdays and Thursdays are straight cardio/cycling days in the gym. Today the spin class was full. It was that tiny little, strict woman instructor too. She's good. There's also the guy who teaches like he's Budda meditating on the immovable spot. A little too freaky, new age or maybe he's just weird. There's also Joerg, who's a happy medium. At any rate, the main point of this is that all the exchanges were in German. The instructor doesn't speak much English so she explained about making a reservation, which I don't think she thought I understood, but I did. She offered her bike, but I told her I didn't have a work permit for that job. I did my own cardio and went downstairs to ask about appointments. Fortunately, the really cool desk guy was there, but I volunteered to try it all in German anyway, possibly because it was the really cool guy. So he explained, conveniently in German, that days like Tuesday which might be busy, you should call before 9am to reserve a spot, arrive and announce yourself, check in, get your laminated reservation card, and cross your name of the list. "All ist klar", signifies you understand everything, which I did. Went back upstairs at the end of the spin class and explained to the instructor, who is nice, that I got an explanation. Went home feeling pretty good.

Damn, just realized I forgot to do crunches.

More importantly, i have settled on a beer brand, which  anyone who's serious about it should known takes time. Sure there will be forays out and other-variety tastings, but one really needs a staple brew to fall back on. For the moment, it is Erdinger Weissbier.

Has anyone noticed that Karl Rove is starting to look like the wicked witch of the west after she got water thrown on her? I mean, the guy can afford Botox and probably has at least one surgeon general in his pocket. If that's what being the dark puppet master does to you, he can keep what's left of the job. I've also always thought Gonzales was nothing more than an admin stooge from the very start. It's almost gratifying to see what's going on except that the entire country is affected by it.  I wish I could follow the news better hear to read the European analysis of the whole mess.

Posted by justjohn at 21:36 | Permalink | Comments (2)

So I spent a small part of Sunday putting the summer tires on the car. A bit early but about half the people out there seem to agree with me. Winter tires are ugly and not properly speed rated. As you might expect, it rained this morning, turning  into thick falling snow by 10am. At 4:30 the roads were bone dry and the sun was out. All notions of "good weather" are being duly readjusted. Still above freezing, it just needed to snow for some reason.

Starting to like the gym a lot. It's a bit more upscale than I'm used to since it has a staffed desk and all. No musclehead crowd either. The thing that's really starting to stand out is that I'm beginning to hear tones of voice again. For a while anyone who spoke german sounded pretty much the same to me. It's odd, but now I'm hearing speech patterns that I recognize to the point that I at first think I'm listening to english. Alas, no. Not quite gibberish but everybody still uses a lot of big words that I don't understand. I sat in a meeting today and went about two sentences into perfect clarity, then got a headache.

A lot of spring type things are beginning to happen here. The bank behind my apartment is covered in white that looks like snow but is actually flower petals, buds are out, and the daffodils are in full bloom. Place is getting to be not so bad...

By the way, Addie seems to be recovering and getting around on her own again. Below is one of my favorite pictures of my animals. Addie looks about like she always does and I caught Milo in a rare moment of actually expressing his disdain for everyone around him.

Posted by justjohn at 22:50 | Permalink | Comments (2)

Or tires. Today I took off the winter tires, not fearing another snow. Maybe some of you northern folks understand this semi-annuak ritual but it is new for me. I think, in fact, a lot of Americans as I have heard more than one visitor comment, in the winter, over all the crappy wheels and tires they see on German cars. A lot of people do not even bother with hubcaps. Here's what I had...

Then we shift into summer driving...

The rules are a bit strict here. If I have an accident, regardless of fault and I do not have the correct seasonal tires on, then my insurance will not pay for the damages.  Since the tire swap cost my 20 euros in tools and 45 minutes, I think I can manage to stay on top of it.

Incidentally, I noticed the summer tires are a bit taller than the winter ones. That means the car will be geared just a bit higher, get slightly better mileage, or kilometerage, and go just a little bit faster on the autobahn...I'd almost bring this car home with me but I don't think it would be as much fun.

Posted by justjohn at 14:43 | Permalink | Comments (0)

I finally stirred myself up enough to go downtown tonight instead of last night. I had done some research and picked out a few bar/cafes. Unfortunately, they were more like the U.S version of "The Alley" in Anderson or maybe a forth of the Casba, without the wine. Not much of a social scene there.

As I was driving into to town I was thinking about this whole "being in Germany" thing and just wondered how I would fit in if I had actually been born here. Both of my parents were college educated and all that crap, but society here is just different and I can't help but wonder. The PhD system is different and I have learned there are two different ways to become an engineer. One is basically tech school with no chance of pursuing an advanced degree and the other follows through a work study program, which is very good, and a practical study in industry for a doctorate, which I'm not entirely convinced on. The U.S. system requires a unique contribution to the field of study and a peer review. I believe, though I'm open to correction, that the German system does not require this. Rather, a practical study and published paper undersigned by a mentor. I think there are some extraordinarily accomplished and technically skilled German doctorates out there but also some real duds who may not have made it in the U.S. system.

Back to downtown Stuttgart...I grew up in a small city. Not a town, or municipality, or incorporated village, but a genuine city with a mall and theaters and everything. Tonight I went down a street of about 100 yards and was beckoned to the door of several establishments by "professional" women. Not what I'm used to. I'm still at a loss for a reaction. None at all? Am I supposed to say thanks, good evening but no? Everyone was nice but it's a big leap from Anderson and Piedmont unless I just don't know what streets to walk down. In between I could have eaten at what looked to be some pretty decent restaurants.

Tomorrow I'll try something touristy and do something I never thought I'd need to; put on the summer tires.

For those of you who do that sort of thing, I have changed the comment status to require a valid email address. Net bots have found this page and keep trying to advertise for Levitra and Walgreens Pharmacy. I would prefer not.

Posted by justjohn at 00:57 | Permalink | Comments (2)

Posted by justjohn at 22:19 | Permalink | Comments (0)

My car's speedometer only reads in km/hr. There's a little gauge that tells me how many liters per hundred kilometers I'm using. I lift 20kg plates at the gym and all the meat prices are per 100g. All this is considered normal. Strange how the U.S. is still stuck with imperial units. All of our engineers are introduced to imperial unit problem solving and then swap over to the sensible method:  Using the metric system.

I wonder if people would think it strange if 16 dimes equalled a dollar?

I caved in to economic pressure and purchased a dvd tonight. My first, I think, in the 21st century. All my others were either rented or given to me. Still without local channels on tv, I need something to switch back and forth between English and German to tune my ear.

Kara, of Frank and Kara, is going to the hospital tonight to give birth to their second child. Wish them well. Frank's at frank (dot) pochiro (at) us (dot) bosch (dot) com.

It's unbelievable how net bots will scrounge for email adresses. I've even had one leave "hoodia diet," which sucks and you should ignore, as a comment on this blog.

Drinking a bottle of Rothchild red tonight, not an old one as a friend coincidentally had last week, but real damn good nonetheless.

Would you believe Snoop Dogg speaks a few words of German? He's in concert here this week and advertising with P. Diddy on the radio. Aside from that the big headlines are a proposal to RAISE the drinking age to 18. Some kid in Berlin drank himself into a coma. The other political hot headline is a proposal to cap the Autobahn speed limit at 200km/hr. Is that really necessary? I just got here and 125mph seems like an unreasonable restriction. I mentioned in a conversation today, to an American, and the reply was "Is that to save gas?" I can only hold the football up people. Maybe 135mph would be a reasonable compromise until I can afford a faster car...

Posted by justjohn at 17:33 | Permalink | Comments (1)

Addie is sick. I got a call reporting that she was listing to one side in the morning and couldn't stand up on the hardwood floor. Bill took her to the vet and the outcome is one of two scenarios; she will either recover (mostly) or is dying. Their description basically sounds like a stroke but has a different name. The other option is a brain tumor, etc which would mean CAT scans and chemo and the option of keeping my dog alive and miserable for a few more months. Not much I can do here except hope for option A and that she makes it until my trip home in May.

For those of you who don't know here history, Addie is a rescue greyhound. Retired from track racing where she lived her entire life on concrete floors and 24 hour fluorescent lights. Her pension plan choices were either a bullet to the head or find a home. She's been with me since November 1999 and lived strictly as an indoor dog, always with a soft spot to lay.

All I can do is wish I were there.

Posted by justjohn at 09:41 | Permalink | Comments (3)

Apparently, "control e" closes the Explorer window and causes you to lose all your typing....

 I saw this article a while back; http://www.livescience.com/animalworld/070222_chimp_hunters.html and I've been turning it over in my head for a while because there was something about it that bothered me. Then I realized, monkeys are functionally retarded people. I apologize for the terminology but I am a child of the 80's and it is a huge pain in the ass to repeatedly type "severely functionally mentally impaired." No spell check either. So I'm thinking about the poor monkeys we keep imprisoned all over the place and the medical and psychological experiments that are performed on them. No plans to go high PETA on you but I did have an interesting wiener schnitzel moment this weekend in Munich which I'll get to later.

Now we've got little creatures running around the planet who aren't people, but have demonstrated advanced tool making skills. Odd, no? If said creatures were people, they would not be locked up and experimented on.  Thanks to the medical benefit cutting power of a conservative Senate over the last decade, functionally retarded people are allowed to roam free. Most people call them "the homeless."

Munich this weekend was a St. Patrick's Day parade, which I had forgotten, and some general Munich-ness. Munich-ness is differrent from Stuttgart-ness. They have a different local greeting and the accent is closer to high German so it is easier to understand. Munich is lederhosen central and where the stereotype comes from. Having recovered from the lederhosen my mother put me in for church as a child, I will probably buy another set this spring but in a larger size. Like the Calgary Stampede, it is entirely appropriate to wear traditional clothing during October Fest. So I shall.

Had my first wiener schnitzel in 20 years while I was there and I, for some reason, always thought it was pork. I was corrected and informed that I was eating veal. I choked on this information, and bite of food, because I do not eat American veal. Understand, I'm all for killing animals for food. I'd do it myself if Bilo didn't but there's got to be a line somewhere and I draw it at American  veal. I make the "American" distinction because what we call veal is a calf that has been raised in the dark, not moving, and kept nutritionally anemic. So nutritionally deprived that it is not uncommon to restrain the calfs head in a bovine version of a shackle. Why? Because otherwise it will lick it's own urine to try and compensate for the nutrient deficiency. The irony that Publix places a screen over "Cosmopolitan" to keep from offending people but puts "VEAL" in 12 inch high letters is not lost on me. Suffice to say, I do not eat veal in America.

I was pleasantly surprised to find out German veal is simply a calf. I will continue to enjoy the wiener schnitzel - which is not German by birth as they will quickly tell you.

Posted by justjohn at 16:18 | Permalink | Comments (5)

So I've made it to Wednesday this week with no major issues except the realization that I can't quite recover from exercise like I did when I was 20. I think I've even managed to contribute some at work and my comprehension of German is slowly but surely improving. By no means fluent but it seems to get better bit by bit.

According to the statistics, most expats head into a major emotional crash around month number three. While I would prefer to be an exception, I can see it coming like a train wreck in slow motion. The cars are starting to buckle so nothing left to do but wait and watch. One of the bigger problems, I would say, is that I don't speak the language well enough to go out and make friends yet. There are certainly enough Americans around but not apparently ones I share interests with. Even so, relying on an English-speaking social circle feels like cheating. I came here to learn the language and culture, Americans can only get you so far in that respect. Still, the occasional email from the U.S. wouldn"t hurt my feelings. They're a little more important these days.

On the up side, for me, is that once I get over the language hump, politics are usually fodder for a lively discussion here. I just heard someone at lunch the other day bashing the U.S. for going to war and comparing our ...leader to one of Germany's more notable, notorious figures, who was Austrian. I wouldn't take the comparison quite that far but he did have a point. Almost no one here is positive about the mess we've made in Iraq. In the name of deterring the use of chemical weapons, and later realizing we were actually just removing a dictator, we've actually killed 30,000 - 75,000 civilians depending on whose statics you believe. I'm really failing to see how removing the dictator has contributed to the health and welfare of the common people. Sadly, we're stuck with a giant mess to clean up, spending money that we really don't have.

Slowly digging out of the time-card deficit. If I can manage the rest of the month disaster free, I'll actually have over-time to spend.

Posted by justjohn at 15:49 | Permalink | Comments (1)

Posted by justjohn at 12:43 | Permalink | Comments (0)

I have to admit I've spent the weekend a bit shuttered in. Last week was German classes every day, plus work, plus a couple of deflating immigration episodes. Taken one at a time, the little problems don't seem like much to bother about but it reallys wears you down after a while. I did manage to find a haircut Saturday. I had to decide how long the sides get cut in millimeters. I started at the long side and will go from there. The guy also styled my hair and I'm afraid I came home looking a little more european than when I left.

This weekend's highlight is that I got the sattelite working and was able to actually receive channels. Of course, I can only do this with the TV sitting in the middle of the floor. I wasn't planning on buying the additional cable etc. to properly situate things until I had the TV working, which happened on a Saturday night. Nothing open today.

I got the commuter bike out since the weather was nice and rode it up the street. Since this was the first real ride since I built it, the shifting went out of adjustment but was promptly fixed when I got home. Tonight I will attend my second spin class at the gym.

I heard some murmurs about Pensacola the other day whilst on the phone with a friend so now I'm starting to look forward to it as my next trip back to the U.S.

The following link sort of changes your perspective on world wide fame and differing tastes, but it is from German Prime-time. Believe me when I say you will not come away the same person.

Posted by justjohn at 11:28 | Permalink | Comments (5)